Saturday

5 trends that I wish would just go away

You know when you see an item of clothing in the shops, in the street, on celebrities and basically everywhere you look but you just don't understand the appeal? Think Ugg Boots. Yeah, we all know that feeling.

Here are my top 5 trends that I wish would just go away and never come back. I don't include Ugg Boots. They're just a given.

1. Chunky zips

River Island, is this really necessary?

This is my biggest pet hate right now. It angers me with a venom I didn't know possible. Picture the scene: I'm in Topshop looking for that perfect dress for my graduation or my holiday or a family event. Across the shop floor, I see something beautiful. It's a dress that is prettier than anything I've ever seen. It has a fitted bodice and a full skirt. It's probably in a delicate pastel shade with a dainty floral pattern and made of some lovely soft material. It is perfect! I pick it up and, lo and behold, there is a great big whopping gold zip right down the back. NO!

How did anybody ever decide this was a good look? At what point does someone produce a cracker of a dress and then think "You know what would make this even prettier... A huge ugly zip right down the middle!". It completely destroys the pretty effect of the item, cuts a line right through the silhouette, totally detracts from the style of the item, adds nothing to the design and isn't even functional.

It makes me want to throw the clothes across the shop floor.

2. Leggings


They didn't look good in the 80s. Or the 90s, for that matter. And they definitely don't look good now. Nope, not even the velvet ones. Or the Mary Katrantzou ones. Or the leather-look ones. Definitely not the leather-look ones. Is it 1978? Are you Olivia Newton-John? Then they won't look good on you.

Nobody wants to see your pants and cellulite (we've all got it!). If you absolutely must wear them, at least wear them under a dress. With boots. Anything to hide the fact that you are actually wearing leggings.

3. Skull cut-out tops

I have to admit, the first time I saw this look, I thought it was pretty cool. "How original", I thought. Then I saw another one. Then another. Then another. Now it's no longer original or creative or innovative. It's just another one of those blooming t shirts with a skull cut into the back. Do something crazy! Be different. Be daring. Cut a penguin shape into the back or something. Anything but another boring skull!

4. Overpirced tat

This top is over £100. Seriously.

Ok, so this one might be a little subjective but by tat, I basically mean really, really basic stuff. Plain white t shirts. Black skirts. Things you can buy in Primark for about £5. I know that not everyone wants to buy clothes in Primark. The quality isn't great and some people are still concerned with the ethics. That's fine. We've still got places like Topshop for reasonably priced basics.

Which is why I will never, ever understand The Kooples. Have you seen the advertising? It might as well say "Hey! You're a hipster with more money than sense! Shop with us!" or "Are you slim and attractive, with an equally slim and attractive partner? Shop with us! You can even share each other's clothes!". Seriously, though, £105 for a simple black T shirt? You have got to be kidding me!

Luckily, I'm neither slim, particularly attractive, hipster or loaded, so I will never have any pressure to shop there. Phew!

5. Hipster glasses

They. look. ridiculous. They were never cool, not even in an ironic way. Now, I know I wear cat's eye glasses (which are prescription, I hasten to add!) but that's not quite what I'm talking about. I mean the proper, full on, massive geek glasses. I wore a pair once. It was Halloween and I was dressed up as Garth Elgar (I came 2nd place in the club fancy dress competition!). That is the only time they are ever acceptable.

The only time this look works. Shwing!

They do not make you look intelligent. They do not make you look stylish. They certainly do not make you look fashion forward. They just make you look like a massive ponce. End of.

Unless you're Garth Elgar, of course. That's a different matter!

10 comments :

  1. Yesss, I'm not the only person who hates those awful big gold zips that get put onto the back of EVERYTHING. They're ugly, make the piece of clothing look 50x cheaper and tackier, and it's the easiest thing in the world for someone to sneak up on you and undo the whole zip behind you.

    I'm going to post up a rant about those stupid glasses too. Your dress-up is great though.

    The Undercover Dress-Up Lover x

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  2. Wow I can't believe that top is so expensive!! That's insane!

    :)
    xx

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  3. "They do not make you look intelligent. They do not make you look stylish. They certainly do not make you look fashion forward. They just make you look like a massive ponce"
    I couldn't agree more...

    xx
    Persefoni

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  4. Wow, crazy price for that little black top. I'm not a fan of uggs either, but think they can work for some people, just. xx

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  5. I could not agree more with this post!!! Love how your personality shines in your posts. We should follow each other!

    sweetsavvystyle.blogspot.com

    xo

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  6. Love this post, so funny !!! Please no more leggins ! If only all those girls could read your post !

    And the Kooples are faaaaar from being the only ones doing such crazy prices on basic tops, wich are even sometime more thin (and so will be more quickly destroyed) than cheaper ones ... So sad ! However when it comes to suit the cut is really amazing.

    xo

    bricetbroc.blogspot.com

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  7. I DISAGREE SO MUCH!
    (well only with the first two)
    1. I like gold zips. Mmmm if I could put a gold zip on everything I would.
    2. What the hell is wrong with leggings?! On some people no. And if they're white no. And those like plastic ones no, sweaty. And if they're those ones that are meant to look like jeans, not jeggings but like the blue leggings with stitching printed down the side... then no as well. But as for the rest, yeeeeeeah!! ESPECIALLY velvet ones.

    Love X
    http://dulcie-dulcie.blogspot.com/

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  8. I think I only agree with you on are the hipster glasses. I have to say I enjoy a pair of leggings, cutout tops and zippered dresses, but that's just my style.

    http://weezngmonkeys.blogspot.com

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  9. definitely agree on the last three

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  10. HAHAHAHA! Awesome post.
    I pretty much agree with you on everything, except that skull shirt is pretty cool (I've never seen one before haha). I've never understood why those big 'geek' 80's glasses became popular. They don't look good... on anyone... EVER. D:

    Btw, I love your Garth look! Five thumbs up! :D

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